Asking for and making a warm intro by email: the forwardable note
A warm intro works when the helper spends thirty seconds. How to ask for one, write the forwardable note, make the intro, and thank everyone afterward.
On this page(7 sections)
- Part 1: asking for an intro
- Check you are asking the right person
- Make it easy to say no
- Write the forwardable note
- Priya, meet Sam. Sam runs a small company that sells scheduling software and is working out how to organize customer email. Sam would value fifteen minutes of your experience. Sam, Priya: I will leave it with you.
- What not to put in the request
- Part 2: making an intro
- Ask both sides first
- Write the introduction
- Part 3: after the intro
- Keeping track
- Common mistakes
- Key takeaways
For a small company, many of the best conversations start with someone saying "you two should talk." A warm introduction carries borrowed trust, and it gets a reply far more often than a cold message does. But it asks a favor of a busy person in the middle, and most intro requests are written in a way that makes the favor large.
The fix is simple: make the helper's job take under a minute. This post covers both sides: asking for an intro, and making one.
Part 1: asking for an intro
Check you are asking the right person
Before you write, answer three questions:
- Does the helper know the target well enough? A friendly acquaintance on a social network is not the same as someone who has worked with them.
- Does the helper know you? They are vouching for you. If they have never seen your work, a short line about why they might trust you helps.
- Is it a fair request? If you have not spoken in two years, say hello first and ask later.
Make it easy to say no
Say outright that "no" is fine. A helper who feels pressured may agree and then never send it, which is worse for you than an honest no. A line such as "If this is not a good time or you would rather not, I completely understand" costs nothing.
Write the forwardable note
The best intro request includes a second message the helper can paste or forward as it is. It saves them from writing, and it controls what the target reads first.
Structure the request like this:
- Why you are writing to them (one sentence).
- Who you want to meet and why (one sentence).
- What you would like from the conversation (one sentence, small and specific).
- The forwardable note below, set apart so it is easy to copy.
Example:
Subject: Could you introduce me to Priya at Northwind?
Hi Dana, I hope the new job is going well. I am looking for a short conversation with Priya Rao at Northwind about how her team handles shared support email. I saw you worked with her last year, so I thought you might be willing to introduce us, but please say no if it is awkward.
To make it easy, here is a note you can forward as is:
Priya, meet Sam. Sam runs a small company that sells scheduling software and is working out how to organize customer email. Sam would value fifteen minutes of your experience. Sam, Priya: I will leave it with you.
Thank you either way.
Notice what it avoids: no attachments, no pitch deck, no long background. The target can learn more from you if they reply.
What not to put in the request
- Your whole product description.
- A request to forward your pitch to the target's team.
- Several targets at once. Ask for one, then another later.
- A deadline.
Part 2: making an intro
When you are the helper, you also protect your own reputation. A bad intro costs you with both people.
Ask both sides first
This is the "double opt-in." Before connecting two people, ask the target if they would be open to it, and give them an easy way out. Only after a yes do you introduce them. Cold-forwarding a stranger's email to a busy person is not an intro; it is a favor taken without asking.
Your check-in message:
Hi Priya, Sam from [company] asked if I could introduce you. They would like to ask about shared support email. Would you be open to a short intro? No problem at all if not.
Write the introduction
Once both agree, write one message to both of them:
- One sentence about each person, saying why they might find the other useful.
- The reason for the introduction and a suggested next step.
- A line stepping out: "I will let you take it from here."
Keep the subject line plain and searchable, such as "Intro: Sam (Acme) and Priya (Northwind)." Put both names first so each of them can find it later.
Then step back. Do not stay on the thread unless asked. Moving yourself to Bcc after sending tells the pair they have the floor; see our rules for Cc and Bcc for how to do this politely.
Part 3: after the intro
If you were introduced:
- Reply to both within a day. Move the helper to Bcc and thank them in the same message.
- Suggest two concrete times, or send a scheduling link, and propose a short call.
- Come prepared: read their public work, and know exactly what you want to ask.
- Afterward, tell the helper what happened, even briefly. People remember being told.
If you are the target and not interested: answer kindly and quickly. "Thank you for the intro, I am not the right person, but try X" costs a minute and keeps goodwill alive.
If nobody replies: wait a week, send one short follow-up, and then let it go. Your follow-up rhythm applies here too, with a lighter touch.
Keeping track
A shared inbox makes this easier. Intro threads often come back weeks later, so label them by person and company, and note who introduced whom. Then a teammate can see the history before answering. Our post on triaging cold pitches shows how to separate genuine intros from unsolicited ones.
Common mistakes
- Asking the helper to write a long endorsement.
- Making an introduction without asking the target first.
- Replying only to the helper, not the new contact.
- Forgetting to close the loop with a thank-you and an outcome.
- Asking for an intro to someone the helper barely knows.
Key takeaways
- Make the helper's job take under a minute: a short request with a forwardable note.
- Say that "no" is fine, and ask for one introduction at a time.
- As a helper, ask the target first and introduce only after a yes.
- After the introduction, move the helper to Bcc, reply quickly and report back.
- Label intro threads so your team can find the history later.
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